The beauty and tragedy of shift work, perhaps at the same time that the personal TV viewing takes place at times to the most unlikely time to time, in which we must have the impression that the program makers feel unseen and just throw some bullshit in the video player. Main thing is that somehow it flickers brightly on the screen. Only then is to explain what goes for scrap, for example, in the morning.
Suppose only time the program from last Friday.
on SWR is a kind of Italian-Western musical called "Blue beans for a hallelujah" from the year 1967. Who now thinks Bud Spencer, who fell for the public Fernsehfuzzis. This probably the worst movie of all time, which I every 10 minutes of my precious life 've sacrificed, it's all about a "Little Big Jane" called Four Cheese High, probably an Italian pop star of the '60s that looks like a cross between Heintje and Marcy Rhodes from "Married with Children". This ties up with Indians to collect, for all the gold of the Wild West and to this end, all long nose to shoot bandits, all of which look like Clint Eastwood from the panel. In between, she constantly breaks suddenly into silly vocals, dance in which Italian singing Indian with feathers in the colors of the rainbow to papier-torture posts. One could go through the whole miserable parody as if the makers had not tried zwischen den Gesangseinlagen einen ernsthaften Spaghettiwestern draus zu machen. Die grausig auf originell gebürstete deutsche Synchro tut ein übriges.
Zappen wir zu „Servus TV“, einem österreichischen Privatsender im Besitz der Firma „Red Bull“. Wo sonst vermehrt von Red Bull gesponsorte Extremsport-Events laufen (immerhin in HD), darf heute ein Sonderling im Irokesen-Outfit und mit breitem Alpendialekt darüber fabulieren, daß er mit Geflügel gut kann und schon als Schulkind Hühner dressiert hat. JA, richtig gehört. Weitere Details über sein besonderes Verhältnis zum Federvieh ersparte uns der Wienerwald-Apache, Manitu sei Dank. Immerhin brachte ihn die The moderator asked, whether he was putting stuff in the chicken feathers and its feathers, as well as from the text into a rage.
ZAPP! allowed on Turkish television, a doctor named Ugur Dikmen (the Turkish inventor of the eponymous chocolate- HARHARHAR! ) spread about the advantages of laser liposuction. In Turkish, of course, during a live view of all the eyes of the unbelievers flawless six-pack of a young lady is geblitzdingst.
ZAPP! In run Polish television just non-stop drug commercials. No joke. No idea how to divide the Poles their advertising time, aber es liefen tatsächlich sieben (!) Pharma-Spots in Folge. Den einzigen, den ich sofort wiedererkenne, ist der für „Strepsils“ mit „Flurbiprofen“, bei dem ich mich jedes Mal frage, ob man zur Herstellung des Medikaments wohl einen Flux-Kompensator braucht.
Im Anschluß an die Pillen-Parade laufen Nachrichten. Die ersten zwei Meldungen drehen sich, nach gängigen Polen-Klischees wenig überraschend, um den Papst. Ständig ist von „Podpis Benedikta“ die Rede, was nur so lange lustig klingt, bis man erfährt, daß „Podpis“ nicht das bedeutet, was man denkt, sondern „Unterschrift“.
ZAPP! On 9live be sought just for once, not three-letter animals, ending in-est, but Walter "teleshopping" Freiwald hawked "Dream Body" called "hand-forged circular bodice from the remnants of the VEB fiber knitted with which mopplige Women's their life buoys inside the body can squeeze. Images that one never forgets. Sorry.
makes 9live comes to life to his name, all the glory. Before the time of the broadcast landscape disappears, it probably also has to like the proverbial cat nine times run over, drowning and throwing from the balcony. And best yet at the end of a stake through the heart, so he also never as a new channel dementia rises again.
zappe Just in time for BR I, where a Paragliderin admits that she in gliding like diaper with because they just do not like their male colleagues can let it run. Finally an information this morning, with which you can do something. And I will certainly come again if I once again see people who look clueless and fascinated in how paragliders take over their heads in circles.
ZAPP! on "Bible TV" Meanwhile, before running contemplative scenery faded Proverbs Bible, accompanied by religious edification hits, either the ring as "We are the world" or how the prisoners choral songs, which usually accompany the closing credits of Charlton Heston-History ham. In principle, this savings program that is barely more substantial or more entertaining than a test pattern. Who the hell can I watch on something?
ZAPP! Na, Gugger ma daa: een Noiores Sendor: "Animal TV". This is actually shines 24 hours a day all about the subject animals to turn. (The name of course not surprising, but you never know. Is the end turns out to be something then maybe as a new dome transmitter for the "country by a woman" clientele.) But at least according to today's program display the themes revolve around dogs, horses and hawks, like in many repeat and / or program loop. Looks so far to a proto-types for the embodiment of the "niche channels" from. And might as well be called "Hanni and Nanni-TV".
ZAPP! on "The 4th" is fittingly the program of "Astro TV" in parallel. An annoying, slightly puffy-looking lady with a squint mixed continuously maps and secretes the-minute teacher-like wisdom from above. Where for the TV audience not to listen to each is what the caller said that this same can be a very special rate of transmission. What question posed by the caller well, the make-up on the esoteric pug abruptly with the words "This is probably nothing more with you." Abbügelt? On the other hand, has my sympathy with the callers quite limited. None whatsoever life crisis justifies just a phone call to Astro TV. Who today really still stupid enough to believe that some unsympathetic figure shooting a can on the phone to predict the price horrendous charges the real future, has it coming to him to be fooled as to rotten.
ZAPP! On DMAX is something I know only as a switch-parody: The Ludolfs. I wonder which TV makers that might have been discovered. It must have expired as relevant as in horror movies: young film crew in the wilds of Arizona (or South Hesse) car broke down. In search of the highway (or A7) take on the warped home incestuous hillbilly who pursue the middle of a junkyard their cannibalistic tendencies. Die Ludolfs are so similar, with the difference that they rip to pieces any human beings but only the German language. Example? "I'm keeping Jetze ma 'the pedal, an' then you must watch out for the Hydra Ulich. "
However, I take from today's episode (my first ever) and a little wisdom. Brother 1: ". Only the first course is broken " Brother 2 out: "What do with the first gear? "
What right has he again somehow.
ZAPP! A small bead is also 'Luxe TV'. Here are all-day broadcast in HD as reportage disguised Werbefilmchen that deal with all that can afford the normal viewers do not: Luxury goods (currently an American Nobel hostel), the more expensive the better. The Spicy snoring at this quality glossy ostentation: Lt. wikipedia, the transmitter is insolvent. A rogue who thinks evil ...
on one of the many permanent advertising channel is being touted just "EarZoom. A sound processor, which looks a bit like the corkscrew headset that is Lt. Uhura from Star Trek are screwed into the ear canal has. The part is advertised as including completely inconspicuous spy device that can secretly eavesdrop. If that's not the high-end device for our intelligence, then I do not know. Disturbing could affect only that the thing a) all possible ist, nur nicht unauffällig, und b) daß es (was die Werbung verschweigt) ALLE Geräusche verstärkt. Wer also im Cafe sitzt und Teenager am Nebentisch belauschen will, der sollte darauf hoffen, daß der Kellner nicht nebenan ein Tablett mit Gläsern fallen läßt. Farewell , Trommelfell.
Über all die anderen zahllosen Teleshopping-, Pseudosport- und weiteren Sparten-Kanäle und –Kanälchen will ich lieber die Decke des Schweigens breiten. Auch, weil mich schließlich die Uhr von meinem Leiden erlöste, weil ich dann doch noch zur Arbeit mußte. Selten habe ich mich so über die imaginäre Schichtglocke gefreut.
